"Just talk to them" By: Heather Patterson

On my mission I felt like I had many opportunities to learn how to recognize and listen to the Holy Ghost. Much of what I learned was from trial and error, which I believe is how many of us learn about spiritual things. The Lord was always patient and loving with me.

             My Companion and I were walking down a road in Clemson,South Carolina looking for a person who had formerly learned about the church. We looked for a while and couldn't find the house. We decided to head back to the car, and look for the next person on our list. We walked past a baseball field where I saw a college age young man running back and forth at the back of the outfield. I thought in my mind, “I should talk to him.” When immediately I reasoned with myself, “He is running, he won't stop to talk to us. I don't want to leave the wrong impression by running him down.” And my companion and I continued to walk. About 100 yards later, I felt as if someone had restrained me from continuing and I stopped mid step. My companion, confused, stopped and asked what was wrong. In a nervous tone, I said, we have to go talk to that man. And I immediately turned and started walking back. Thoughts of doubt continued to flood my mind, and in a joke I said a prayer out loud and said, “God, if you want us to talk to this young man, please make him stop and walk toward us.” I chuckled while looking at my companion, and when I turned to look at the man, he stopped. And he began to walk toward us. I felt so small, like God could crush me right then and there. I couldn't believe that God heard my prayer that fast...and actually answered it that fast. We spoke with the man, and invited him to learn more, and he politely declined. As I walked away, I wondered why the Lord would be so animate that I talk to this man, if He knew that he wasn't going to accept. I have come to a few conclusions; the one I treasure the most is God asked me to do it to help me recognize spiritual promptings. He did it to let me know He heard me, and loved me. He did it to help me improve, and to have joy.

           I know God loves and is aware of His children. He loves and cares for those who are troubled, out-casted, struggling, succeeding, hurting, different, strange, and even dis-functional. There were many points in my mission that I struggled to feel successful or like I was making a difference. These feelings are normal, but I saw the Lord reach out and touch my life to help me see that I was helping those around me.

            My companion and I had a rough morning. Things fell through, and we hadn't seen eye to eye on much of what we were trying to plan. We were allotted 1 hour a week to go to the library to talk to our families. As we entered the library, I noticed a young man sitting on the bench right outside the door. I wish words could describe him, but I feel like they wouldn't do justice. If I had to chose which of all who were most likely to kill themselves or others...I would have picked him. Immediately, I felt that I was to talk to this young boy. It was almost like I had no other option. My companion and I went into the bathroom, and there I prayed for God to give me the courage to speak to this man. The night before, I had again committed myself to talk to every one that came into my path, and I figured if I had promised, the Lord would lead me where I needed to be. Which was here. We walked out of the bathroom and I walked straight up to him and sat down. “Hi!” I said. “My name is Sister Patterson, and this is Sister Grover. We are going upstairs to use the computers, would you like to come along?” And he said yes. For the whole hour, we talked. He was living in a boys home. His childhood years broke my heart. He wanted to get his life together so he could go and marry the girl he loved and have a family. The more I talked to him, the more I saw what God saw in him. And by the end of our conversation, I loved him. I knew the Lord put him in my path, not just for him, but for me. He helped me see and love him how our Savior sees and loves him.  This young man never investigated the church, and I only saw him once after that. But I know that day made a difference. If not for him, it did for me.

A Word or Two about my Son, Anakin By: Iolie Harper

 

Anakin is one of my heroes.  I think about him every day.    I think that I will probably think about him every day for the rest of my life.  Anakin was born on Nov 21, 2014.  I had an emergency c-section because his heart rate had dropped dramatically all of a sudden.  When I came out of the anesthesia, my first question was, “Where’s Anakin?”  Then the doctor told me that he didn’t make it.  I think I was still unconscious after surgery for about 30 minutes or so.  So when I came to, he was already departed from his body.  Thankfully he stayed around for a little bit to let me know he was okay.  That’s the part I want to write about today.

                I was so excited to find out that we were having another baby.  I also kind of dreaded being pregnant because it’s very uncomfortable in a lot of ways.  However, the good part was always being with Anakin… every day.   We did everything together and I was very glad to have him along.   We went for walks A LOT.  We checked the mail, cleaned the house, worked outside, did laundry, went for rides, and we got to do it all together. 

                As soon as I found out we were having a boy, his name was already picked out.  I woke up one morning shortly thereafter and in that portion where sleep coincides with waking up, he came to me and told me, “My name is Anakin Ammon Harper.”  He said that very decisively.  I was grateful to know that he liked that name because that was the one I was considering. 

                We talked to him a lot.  Ammonihah was always being told to be careful of his younger brother who was still in mommy’s stomach.  We told Ammonihah that he was going to be a great big brother.  He seemed to be pretty excited about the prospect.  We were all excited.

                I started seeing a doctor in Showlow because we moved.  He noticed that there was some irregularity in Anakin’s heartbeat.  Sometimes it would slow down or lag a tiny bit.  So for the last month, I went in to the doctor a lot to have them monitor the baby’s heartbeat.  There was also some discrepancy about when Anakin was due.  The doctors were having some questions about the accuracy of his due date because it didn’t match up to the results of his last ultrasound. 

                The last day that I went in to have his heart monitored, the doctor decided to have us stay the night at the hospital.  I had also been having minor contractions.  So they kept me there in Showlow overnight and that was the last night I spent with Anakin.  The doctor told me we would be kept there until tomorrow morning when they would decide whether to have us sent out to Phoenix or not to have him delivered. 

                However, early in the morning before the doctors were scheduled to have their meeting regarding us, Anakin’s heartbeat suddenly dropped.  I remember that I had shifted to laying on my side and that the nurse was having trouble trying to read his heartbeat so she kept moving the heartbeat reader from spot to spot to get a more audible reading.  It was underneath my stomach and was pressing pretty far into my belly but the sound was coming in more clearly.  Then his heartbeat dropped all of a sudden so low that Ammon noticed it. 

                A nurse came in and was confused as to whose heartbeat it was, mine or Anakin’s.  Pretty soon there was flurry of activity around me and the nurses called in the head Administrator of the Hospital who started talking to me about an emergency c section because the heartbeat was still dropping.  My doctor came in and I gave permission.  I was praying in my mind for a miracle over and over before I made that decision because in the last priesthood blessing I received, I was told that Anakin would be strong and healthy.  That he would not have any problems and that we would have a natural birth.  I was told in the blessing that he would also have aptitudes that were even higher than that other people possessed.  I had asked Ammon if he remembered what he said when he gave that blessing.  He said that he couldn’t recall any of it.  He never remembers what he said after he gives a blessing because the Holy Spirit takes over.

                So I didn’t understand when they whisked me off to the surgery room.  I decided to give my life over to Heavenly Father’s care because I was also scared that I wouldn’t wake up due my very real intolerance of medications that I had had for the last 10 years. 

                Ammon watched the whole thing.  He was heartbroken.  The doctor then came to get him when I was coming to and he told him that they would tell me immediately that Anakin didn’t make it.  He said that he has seen women who weren’t told when they had asked about their baby and they tend to get crazy if no one will tell them what happened.  So when I woke up, I asked.  Then the doctor told me he didn’t make it.

                My first thought was, “The Lord giveth; the Lord taketh away.  Blessed be the name of the Lord.”  Then I realized I was alive and that Heavenly Father wanted for me stay here and take care of my other kids.  I was very grateful for that.

                Then I saw Anakin.  My eyes were closed, but I could see him so very vividly it was almost like seeing with my natural eyes.  He was tall…. About 6’4.”  He had dark brown, almost black hair.  Just like mine except very smooth.  He was about 21 to 24 years old and was so very, very handsome.  His features were almost perfect.  He was wearing glasses that look like his dad’s glasses but with a very light prescription.  He was slender and shaped with wide shoulders and a small waist.  Just the right muscle structure.  His skin was beautifully clear. He was wearing casual clothes.  I think light brown pants.

                I could tell that he was very excited about something.  He was waving at me and smiling from ear to ear.  He was acting like he just accomplished something monumentous and was showing me.  He wanted me to see what he had done so I could be proud of him and so I could share in his glorious moment.  He was superbly excited that he was going to move forward to something new. 

                Anakin was standing on the sidewalk in some great city, downtown where there were skyscrapers all around him.  He had a suitcase in his hand and was walking as he waved at me.  I wished I could draw so I could draw him so that Ammon could see what he looked like.

                I could also tell that he was very intelligent.  He was kind and of a very happy nature.  He liked to laugh and have a good time.  He also was without guile.  His only motive was to build up Heavenly Father’s kingdom.  He also had the natural capacity to move forward very quickly.  He moves from light to light very naturally.  He progresses fast. 

                I related all this to Ammon as I was seeing it.  So everyone in the room ended up hearing it as well because I had a slew of nurses and doctors around me at the time helping me sit up and getting me ready to get a shot in the back for pain.  However, I was groggy enough still that it may as well have been only Ammon and me as I was only marginally aware of the other people in the room besides my doctor and the anesthesiologist.

                As the vision ended, I told Ammon that Anakin never intended to stay.  He had it set to leave when he did and he had planned it that way before he was conceived.  He was very happy to have us as his parents and had come to earth to get parents and a body and to be part of our family.  I told him that Anakin and Heavenly Father had planned it that way. 

                Later that day, Ammon told me that he had held Anakin’s lifeless body in the nursery previous to me waking up.  He had prayed to God and asked Him to let Anakin be okay and to protect him.  He then felt Anakin’s spirit in the room with him.  When the doctor told him that I was waking up, he told Anakin to go and let me know that he was okay and that he was fine.  So that’s what he had done.

                After a couple hours, the nurse brought Anakin’s little body in to us.  I was kind of scared of how I would react but we both held him and looked at his little hands, his hair, feet, shoulders, etc.  He was a full grown baby boy but he did have some visible indications that showed that he might have had a hard time physically in life if he would have survived to live on earth. 

                I felt his presence and felt inclined to speak to him.  I told him how proud we were of him and of how glad we were to be his parents.  I told him how glad I was of the time we had with him and related some of those things.  Then when I felt inclined to end, I felt his presence leave at the same time.  So I stopped talking feeling that we had said what we needed to.

                We had a funeral and he has the cutest, tiny grave in Cibeque in our family cemetery right on top of hill under the beautiful sky.  He has my favorite afghan buried over his little casket and other that his grandmother also made and sent before he was born.  He is buried in white temple baby clothes with a blue cap and a white bonnet over the cap.  He has little light blue and white baby socks on.  He looked really cute.  

Many close family members were there as well as some church members.  From Saint Johns, Bishop, his wife and daughter were able to make it and officiate.  Also, Brother Brewer along with his wife and baby came.  He is our neighbor and he played the piano for us even though it was a long way to drive.

When I would start to wonder, people would randomly show up and remind or tell us that Heavenly Father has a plan for us and our son.  We ran into a lady at the bank in Taylor where we had never been before and she said she had heard of us.  She told us her grandbaby had died and she had heard of us and wanted to tell us that Heavenly Father knew us and had a plan for our son. 

Sister Brown told me that her son had passed away in similar circumstances and a friend had told her that she had seen her son in a dream and had asked him why he died.  Her son told the friend that he knew that if he had died at the time he did that it would have been easier on her than if he had been older when it happened so he had chosen that time specifically.  I felt that Anakin had chosen similarly. 

Bishop told me after I related the vision to him that he felt that Anakin was leaving to serve a mission in the spirit world and that impression came to him at that time.

I felt that Ammonihah and Anakin had made a plan previous to their being born that one would go forward and the other would stay to comfort me.  Ammonihah has been a great comfort to me since he’s young enough that I still feel like I have a baby to care for.

One day I was watching a movie while really thinking about Anakin and the words from a character in the movie struck my heart and thoughts, “It was the best way that he could show you that he loves you.”  I pondered on that thought.  I wouldn’t want to be separated from my son and I’m not.  My perspective has changed unbelievably.  My little family now spans into eternity with one son who has gone forward to gain his celestial exaltation.  He’s safe now and his future is assured.  He lifts us up with the work he does on the other side of the veil.  He has brought us closer to heaven.  I feel much more connected to eternity than I did before.  I feel the pull of those on the other side of the veil more keenly than I did before and it’s because of Anakin’s courage, faith, good example, and natural aptitudes.  We love him and speak of him often. 

My husband got a calling about 2 months after Anakin’s passing into eternity.  He was called to be a family history teacher in the ward.  I think it’s because Anakin wants his dad working alongside him so we can always be connected to each other.  Forever.

               

               

I Believe in a Small Town Life By Ty Bond

In the year of 1986, my family moved to a small town in the eastern boarder of Arizona. At that time the town of St. Johns had a population of approximately 4000 residents. Saint Johns was established in 1871 when the Saints joined with the Hispanics. St. Johns is the county seat and is supported by two major power plants that drive its economy.

Looking back on my life I realize how great it was. I remember riding my bike to the snow cone shop with my best friend when we were six years old. It didn’t seem like a big deal back then, but as an adult I now realize that the snow cone shop was a two mile ride, half of which was on the main street.

As I grew older I had some amazing opportunities that most kids don’t get to have. I was blessed to have a horse that I could ride anytime. I was able to be a member of some amazing organizations such as 4-H and other local rodeo associations. These programs played major roles in the foundation that built the person I am today.

In high school you could find me and my small band of brothers out on a ranch with a bonfire blazing. This is where we learned how to blow things up. We all hung out with classic country music blaring while telling our war stories and jokes. With our fast trucks and fireworks, we sure tested the patience of the local men in blue. We were found trying to impress the girls, to no avail, with what we thought was some good, smooth talking country boy schemes. We knew our limits between God and Law; we feared them both.

There is a fine line between good and bad in a small town and it is very easy to cross either line. When you grow up in a small town you encounter peer pressure from good and bad influences. In my experience, I became who my friends were. I had friends on both sides of the fence. A group of friends who liked to party and drink and another that walked right with God. It is amazing to me I found myself wanting to impress the friends that did right. This pushed me to make good decisions when times came.

Living in a small town I always had people that would stand up and defend me when I needed them. I learned this in the fall of 2007 when I found myself in a life or death situation, after I was involved in a traffic collision. People I had known my entire life was doing everything in their power to keep me alive. They all came together to keep me alive and on this earth; with all my fingers and toes working in working order. It was then I realized how amazing my small town was.

 I have tried several times to leave this small town, but it has a hold on me. When it came down to it, I just couldn’t go. For some reason I am meant to be a part of this small town.  This is where I would like my kids to grow up and make memories of their own. I understand that times have changed and our little “Mayberry” town isn’t what it once was.  I probably won’t let my kids ride their bikes to that same snow cone shop when they are six years old.  Though, regardless of the changes, I can tell you that I still believe in small towns and in the great opportunities they give the youth to gain their own experiences.

 Now that I am older I feel like it is my duty to give back to the community that has given so much to me. I love that I have the opportunity to give back to the kids in the 4-H program. I think it’s ironic how the pages have turned, now I am the one in blue getting my patience pushed to the limits from a new band of brothers trying to learn their way through life. I truly believe that the only life for me is the small town life.

Creating Modern Day Captain Moronis By: Claryce Crosby

  " Our War Against Pornography"  

The Plague of Pornography:

“And now I show unto you a mystery, a thing which is had in secret chambers, to bring to pass even your destruction in process of time, and ye knew it not;” Doctrine and Covenants 38:13

A few weeks ago my husband and I returned to the city we spent our first decade of our marriage together in.  After eight years, we were blessed to see many of our old friends and catch up with their and their children’s lives.  Our four hour trip home was consumed with talk of the many tragedies our friends have experienced over the last eight years and how we could help our children and the youth in our ward avoid similar tragedies.  Celestial marriages have been wrecked, once strong missionaries have gone astray, complete families have left the church, and seminary youth we thought were so strong have abandoned their faith.  As we discussed this, we found that most of the tragedies could be traced back to pornography.  Together we mourned for the victims and brainstormed ways to prepare our youth. 

The next day, I was reading Alma 52.  I’ve always been so impressed with Moroni’s amazing ability to lead and prepare the Nephite armies.  I’ve often prayed that my boys will be like Moroni, learning how to stand for right at a young age and then strengthen others in the war against evil.   I read verse 19, ”…Moroni and Teancum and many of the chief captains held a council of war….that they might gain advantage over them (the Lamanites).”  These great captains and general came together to devise strategies to regain their City with as few causalities as possible and they were very successful. 

My children are young, and I’ve been in Primary for 12 years, so my focus is on avoiding the problem, not necessarily overcoming it.  Recent research has shown that most kids are being exposed to pornography by the time they are NINE!   I am convinced that preparing them to deal with the temptations when they come and helping them see the tragedies indulging in the temptations bring, are vital to avoiding pornography.   I was struck by how affective Moroni’s proactive approach to this war was, how their strategies saved thousands of lives and I wondered how our family could learn from their example.  My thoughts eventually converged into this fun Family Home Evening:

I told the boys that in a few days we’d be having a war council to devise strategies against the war on pornography and to be thinking of ideas to contribute to our council.   I baked something really good and made them look at it all day, saying, “No, that’s for the war council...you’ll have to wait.”  When the time finally came, I had the boys build a tent, like Moroni might have used for his war council, out of blankets in our living room.  We turned out all the lights and used a flashlight to crawl into the tent. 

In my most masculine and serious voice, I told them that they were each the general of their own mind, and only they, would be able to keep bad thoughts and pictures out of it.  We were here to discuss strategies to defeat pornography in our lives. The flashlight went around the circle and each general gave a strategy until we ran out of ideas.  Here is what the Crosby Generals devised to win our war against pornography:

We are Waging

WAR AGAINST PORNOGRAPHY

WAR TACTICS

1. Change the channel-quickly (tv channels and/or mentally switch topics)
2. Crash and Tell-quickly (turn off the computer and tell a parent)
3. Look ahead to see the consequences that come with pornography and decide you don’t want that for your future.
4. Never START and you’ll never have to STOP!
5. Pray to keep pornography out of your minds.
6. Have friends with the same standards.
7. Be 100% honest with yourself and with Dad in PPI’s.
8. If you accidently see pornography, come tell Mom or Dad right away. 

It was short and sweet (maybe 10 minutes), but fun for the boys.  Our strategies now hang on the fridge so we can remember them.

Please note:  Research is showing  that more than 70% of men in the church battle with pornography addictions and they are being exposed VERY young.  Thus, we have discussed pornography, masturbation and sexual fantasies in depth with our boys many times prior to this activity (of course we keep it age appropriate and don’t use those words per say). 

Karson also does PPI’s (Personal Priesthood/Parent Interview) with them every Fast Sunday to make sure they know they are accountable for their thoughts and actions to someone.   We both feel PPI’s are essential to helping boys stay away from masturbation and pornography.   Interestingly enough, through these PPI’s we have discovered that our six year old has experienced more issues of concern than our nine year old.  Each child will begin to experience sexual feelings at a different age, and since we don’t know what that age is, we feel we should begin as soon as the child can talk with a very simple PPI and then cater it to their maturity level as they grow.  

With today’s media, even the commercials are stimulating our youth.  As parents, we absolutely HAVE to discuss these issues with our children.  If we don’t, the world will.  Sadly, because we parents are too afraid to discuss sexual feelings with our youth, they are turning to the world to understand their sexual confusion.  The world is quick to interpret their confusion as “homosexuality”.    When I was a school counselor in Kingman I noticed a high rate of same sex attraction in 7^th and 8th grade.  Kids this age are coming into their bodies, they need someone to talk to about the changes and when it’s not parents, it’s friends, or TV or the internet.  I feel that because of the homosexual push in media, it is natural for those kids to “decide they must be gay”.   Do we want TV and internet explaining sexual feels to our children?  If we parents talk with our kids about sexual feelings, the confusion will be eliminated, their feelings normalized, and a plan put in action to deal with their feelings and desires.  This will help them fulfill God’s Plan of Salvation with a beautiful and healthy intimate relationship after their temple marriage.