Kindness vs. Love by Tobie Overson

Last week in our fast and testimony meeting, Sister Jackie Lee stood and bore her testimony and some things that she said have really influenced my thoughts this week.  She was talking about her feelings of the Savior and a specific experience she had where she had the opportunity to feel some of Christ’s feelings.  This is not a direct quote from her, but this is what I got from what she shared.  Christ is very kind and His kindness is way beyond any kindness we can feel on this earth, but He is also VERY loving and His love even surpasses His kindness.  For instance, the money changers in the temple probably didn’t think Christ was being very kind when he rebuked them and overturned their tables; nevertheless, He acted out of love and He loved them (and His Father) enough to correct their behavior.  The young lawyer didn’t perceive the Savior as being kind when He told him to go and sell all that he had and follow Him, yet what better thing could he have done?  Because of the stage of life I am in, when I heard Sister Lee’s words, I thought about them in terms of being a mother. A couple of things in particular came to mind.

First, when our children are little, they would be tickled to eat candy and junk food all the time if we would let them.  (At least this has been the case with my kids!)  It may seem kind to give them what they want, but it would definitely not be loving.  Their health and teeth would obviously suffer as a result of being “kind” in this instance. Our children may currently think otherwise, but they’lllater realize that every time I made them eat what was on their plate or nothing at all, I was acting out of complete love for them.  I have even had the blessing of having older children thank me for making them eat their veggies and that gives me the courage to continue my fight with the younger ones.

Second, our teenagers love to see what they can get away with. It is hard to be a “popular” parent with thembecause when we correct their course we are often met with the words, “This is not fair!” or, “Why are you so mean?”  As parents of teenagers, it is not our job to always do what they believe is “kind” but to do what is most loving, always having in mind their eternal future and how their current decisions will affect that.  It takes a great deal of perspective to be able to do this consistently and it is something that I pray for daily.

Lastly, our loving Heavenly Father sent us to this earth without the memory of what we experienced before we came.  Each of us has been sent to different homes with lots of different situations and trials to deal with, sometimes making it very difficult to choose the right way.  Some may look at that and think it is “unkind” or “unfair” of God to do that.  But if we take a closer look, we see that He is showing complete love for us.  He knows that we only grow and become like Him when we are stretched, so He allows us to have trials and difficulties in our lives that will get us back to Him because He loves us so perfectly.

Thank you, Sister Lee, for your precious testimony. I want to be kind as the Savior is kind and to love as the Savior loves.