I Am a Child of God by Sydney Nielsen

As a young primary girl, I had a very simple understanding of this truth. I imagined this heavenly being, that looked a bit like my own earthly father, yet was clearly not as tangible as you or me.  As I have grown, my understanding of this eternal fact has deepened.  My perception of my Heavenly Father has evolved from an abstract concept to a concrete truth.  Much of my testimony of my Heavenly Parent’s character and nature I have come to know through my earthly parents' examples.  

I am a firm believer that the trials and adversity we face in this life are meant to teach us eternal principles and mold us into the children our Heavenly Father sees us as.  Nearly two years ago, I faced a trial that shook my testimony and questioned my worth as a daughter of God.  I was in a situation in which I needed to make a decision.  On one hand, I could stay in a relationship in which I was completely alone, had little-to-no self-esteem, and had more of a roommate than an eternal companion.  On the other hand, I could move on and try and regain a life that I had completely alienated myself from while trying to fix my relationship.  At this time in my life I felt completely lost and alone.  It was then when I turned to my two greatest sources,  my Heavenly Father and my earthly family.

As I struggled with my decision, my loving Father in Heaven patiently and persistently answered each and every question I brought to Him.  The first time I received an answer to leave, I was not ready to act on it.  That didn’t stop the answer from coming when I prayed for a second time.  Yet, again I could not act.  Finally, when I asked for the third time, I was sweetly answered with the comfort and reassurance of my decision.

Throughout my struggle, my earthly parents stood by me. They mourned the loss of a daughter who had lost herself. They spent countless nights crying with me as they held me in their arms.  They had many sleepless nights and late night prayers in my behalf.  I relied upon their love and support. I relied upon their strength to carry me through.  This brings to my mind a quote by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland in his April 2017 conference address entitled Songs Sung and Unsung. “In those moments when the melody of joy falters below our power of expression, we may have to stand silent for a time and simply listen to others, drawing strength from the splendor of the music around us.”  At that time, I felt the unconditional love my parents had for me, and I am grateful that I was born to such “goodly parents.”

As I have felt the great love of my earthly parents, I can imagine the perfect love that Heavenly Father has for me.  I remember a night when my heart felt so broken and heavy all I could do was lay in bed and pray to my Heavenly Father.  In the quiet darkness of the night, as I struggled with feelings of sadness and inadequacy, I imagined myself sitting at my Heavenly Father’s feet looking up at him.  In my mind I whispered to Him, “I miss you.” In that moment, I felt a great warmth rush through my body and the words, “I miss you too” entered my mind. I cannot deny the perfect love Heavenly Father has for us.

It is through these experiences that I know without a doubt that I am a daughter of God.  I know He knows us all by name and that He loves us more than we can even comprehend.  I know that we can turn to Him at any time, and He will be there.  I know that we were born to our earthly parents for a purpose, and it wasn’t just by chance.  I am so grateful for my parents and their example to me.  I am even more grateful to my Heavenly Father for His love and patience that He freely gives to His children.